


Can't You See It's You I'm Watching

by turduckenail



Series: Poetry [2]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Dash is still bad at emotions but he's getting better, Gen, Paulina is the friend who laughs at you when you make bad decisions, assholes talking shit and being best friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-11-02 05:57:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20644997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/turduckenail/pseuds/turduckenail
Summary: Dash has no idea what he's doing. Paulina isn't much help.





	Can't You See It's You I'm Watching

“So that’s where I’m at right now.”

Paulina takes a long sip from her soy caramel macchiato with whipped cream and extra caramel. She doesn’t break eye contact with you the entire time. Finally, finally, she puts down the mug with a quiet tap against the table. “Dashie, that’s gay.”

You nod. “Yup.”

“Are you gay?”

“Not a clue. I’ll deal with that question in therapy.”

She smirks. “You don’t do therapy.”

You quirk your eyebrows and concede the point. “I’ll figure it out eventually.”

Paulina just hums and picks up her sugary monstrosity drink again. “So. Fenton.”

“What about him?”

“Didn’t you used to treat him like shit in high school?”

You shrug. “Yeah, pretty much.”

“I thought you hated him.”

“I did. Not so much nowadays.”

“So why the change of heart?”

“Well I used to think it was because I’d grown as a person since high school and developed a sense of respect for other people or some shit but now I’m wondering if me hating him was just a case of subconsciously repressed gay.”

Paulina, bless her fucking heart, throws her head back and laughs. She’s such a bitch, and that’s exactly why she’s your best friend.

“Oh my god- I can’t- I- holy shit-” She’s heaving in deep gasps of air in between words in an attempt to calm down. You just sit there and calmly drink your own sugary monstrosity like a polite member of society instead of falling out of your chair ugly laughing. Like some people you could mention.

Bitch deserves to embarrass herself anyway. She’s ruined you for black coffee and now you can never go back.

Finally, she collects herself, still giggling as she straightens up in her seat, adjusts her hair and carefully wipes a tear from her eye. You have no idea how she does that without getting eyeliner everywhere. “Oh Dash. My little Dashie. That’s the most spectacular way anyone has ruined their personal growth in the history of ever.”

“‘S not that funny,” you say, smiling into your mug.

“It’s hilarious. Hi, I’m Dash Baxter,” she says, trying to lower her voice to mimic yours and still coming up several octaves too high, “I thought I’d learned not to be a dick and respect the people I used to hate but turns out I was just sexually frustrated the whole time.”

That makes you snort. “Okay, maybe it’s a little funny.”

“Whatever like — author in the sky trying to write your character arc right now,” she goes on like you hadn’t spoken, “is just trying desperately to make you learn from your past and become a better person, and then—” she’s desperately trying not to laugh but just ends up snorting like a pig mid-sentence. “Then you go and fucking wreck all their hard work by saying the only reason you hated him was because you couldn’t deal with your own gay and it made you angry—” This time she actually does fall out of her chair laughing.

God, you hate this woman so much.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in literally like fifteen minutes this morning because TLW wasn't cooperating and I wanted to write something stupid and easy. I kind of actually like this universe and I might play in it a bit more sometime but who even knows what the future holds. 
> 
> Anyway kudos/comments if you enjoyed, I'm on twitter @turduckenail if you wanna come hang out, fingerguns.


End file.
